The 21 Times Phenomena

I was talking with a co-worker today about strategies for modifying our behavior (think New Years' Resolutions) and I was reminded of a phenomena that I call '21 Times', basically if you want to change something, do something new, add something to your routine, do it 21 times and by the 22nd, it will be a part of your DNA.

Simple. Yes, and no.

To really work, you need to be aware of each of the 'times' - "This is the 16th time I have not procrastinated", "This is the 17th time I have not procrastinated", etc. It is this explicit 'calling out' of the repetitions that turns an idea; I would like to not be a procrastinator, into a part of who you are.

So, we have all experienced self-help programs, you can get help for free, or spend thousands on sitting at the feet of gurus, yet when we get back to our own reality, how well do we implement the teachings? I bet on reflection we would all say, not so well. Me too. Unless you really want to change. So that's a big part of it, willingness. My 21 Times strategy is just an easy to remember tool that helps you when you really want to make a lasting change.

I have seen this work in my own life many times. Seriously.

Tony Robbins talks about Learning Strategies and how it is a simple 3 step process to learning anything, like a foreign language or how to do better sales forecasts.

1. Immersion. If you can go to a foreign country for a month, great. If you can go off site for a week, awesome, if you can get away and immerse yourself (take a class, an online seminar, whatever takes you away and bathes you in the new ideas)
2. Stepped Repetition. This is what I call the 21 Times Phenomena. You need to repeat the thing you want to learn over and over and over, I say 21 times is the magic number.
3. Find a Peer Group. Once you have done 1 and 2, you will want to be around others that will support you going forward, like be in a Spanish Club, or a Morning Networking Group for Sales Executives - you get the idea.

Simple.

Some examples of how the 21 Times Phenomena have showed up for me;

At a golf lesson, "Mark, I want you to take your club and hit 7 balls, rest 2 minutes, then hit 7 more, then rest 2 minutes and hit 7 more" Do the math, that's 21 times that you are hitting the ball a specific way (after getting coaching from the instructor). Great way to get better. Hey, you still have to hit it 1000's of times to get good. I am just talking about cementing the learning.

At a exercise session, "Mark, for the next three weeks I want you to do this set of exercises, then we will meet up again" - 3 weeks is 21 days. After doing them faithfully, I was hooked. And exercise became a part of my regimen.

Two examples, but I bet if you thought about it, you would see that the 21 Time Phenomena has shown up in your life, you just didn't know it.